Tuesday, October 13, 2009

A Small Glitch in the Perfect Atheist Life?

Just imagine it's a beautiful winter morning, nearing Christmas in your lovely Communist community. And as you and your sexy wife (Madalyn Murray O'Hare maybe) are sitting at your kitchen table reading Sagan watching snowflakes gently fall to the ground you realize just how good life is. Hell, there isn't even a Nativity Scene with in a hundred miles of your commune err I mean neighborhood. You and Madalyn are wearing your matching WWMSTD bracelets, (what would mao tse tung do) anyways life just couldn't be better.... but then little Suzie your only daughter one of your 1.5 kids and the cutest little Atheist in pig tales that you've ever seen, comes in and asks "Mommy, Daddy my friend from school (Karl Marx elementary school) wants to know if I can go to Sunday School with her, can I go please"?

What do you tell little Suzie?


  1. lol, is that your view of what a "typical" Atheist is?

    What's WWMSTD bracelets by the way?

    To answer the question, personally I would say yes of course. Why not?

    I would tell her to have fun reading stories with her friend!

  2. I'm glad you laughed, just joshin' you all a little.

    Oh back in the day the WWJD bracelets were real big, you know, What Would Jesus Do?

    Peace Homie, feeno

  3. This is the greatest blog since blogs were sliced bread!

  4. I'll one-up you JB. It's the best thing since CORN FLAKES!

  5. Feeno, I know you meant this as a joke, but where did this idea come from that atheists are communists?

  6. Hello Lordship

    I didn't mean to lump you in with the likes of Marx, Lenin, Castro, Stalin, Mao, Kim Jong il Hu Juntao or Tham Shwe, but they are all both Communists and Atheists and oddly enough horrible people and leaders. But I will stand side by side with you Gun Totin' Atheist to combat them sum bitches if we must. God bless the U.S.A. and God bless his Lordship the gun-toting Atheist.

    Good night, feeno

  7. Oh I understand the bracelet thing now, hehehe, well don't forget that we don't have the same culture you know ;)
    First I am Canadian, but it's more complicated than that because I am Québécois (French Canadian, from the province of Quebec...), so I basically have a whole different culture!
    Anyway, we would still be on the same side if we ever have to fight communists dictators; that's for sure :)

  8. Ohhh being a ex Christian Atheist i would most likely remember the absolute morals of matters drumed into me while in school of faith.And so like Hitler and Stalin etc act all christianly atheist absolutest and say no!, of course not you cant! ill have to completely ecommunicate and even withdraw from you if you dare do.

    :) Hey Homie....Hows it hanging Feeno

  9. Gandy-you so crazy

    I'll try to respond to everything, it may take a minute or two. Also I mentioned you in Harvey's last post.

    See ya in a minute, feeno

  10. "Also I mentioned you in Harvey's last post."

    Hi Fee ..Yeah in his new post about the sermons etc he will be broadcasting right.

    I nearly replied.But decided i already critique Harvey more than enough.Decided sometimes ill keep out of the discussion,and leave it for those who worship etc.

    I still have some respect left for faithful folks,and im not out to destroy their fun.I hold them to keeping it honest etc,but dont want to become like a rottweiler who shake the shit outa their every move they make.

    Take care

  11. Let me tell you guys. I may not be a believer in the Christian Faith, yet I really don't like communists.

    People have a right to own property and to profit from private enterprise, and to enjoy the fruit of their labor. Commies impose the will of the majority upon the individual, and that is just plain wrong. But you can't be a greedy selfish bastard who profits from other people's misery either.

    I mean, did you guys know that Hitler was a devout Christian who blamed Jews for the death of Jesus? That doesn't mean that all Christians are nazis. Just because Stalin was an atheist doesn't mean that atheists are communists.

    A girl wrote a comment on my blog yesterday and she said this (I'm paraphrasing)"there are horrible people in any belief system". I know it's tempting to find the worst possible examples to describe the 'other team', but we can't make generalities. I mean, Feeno here is a honest man who likes good beer. That's not evil at all.

  12. Lordship,

    Last night me and my wife went out to dinner and I asked for a India Pale Ale. No luck, but I will keep trying.

    I don't know what Hitler believed. Was he an Atheist or a Christian? Kinda like Pres. Obama, is he white or black? I thought he was black, then I saw him dance.

    Hitler was actually born Catholic. And early in his life and career he used "Christian" rhetoric
    I believe to further his cause. But certainly and well documented is that by the time he took control over Germany he was anything but a Christian. From about 1940 until his death he ranted on and on about how absurd Christian faith is. A few quick examples, Hitler said "National Socialism and religion cannot exist together.." The heaviest blow that ever struck humanity was the coming of Christianity, Bolshevism is Christianity's illigetimet child. Both are inventions of the Jew. The deliberate lie in the matter of religion was introduced into the world by Christianity.

    or "Christianity is an invention of sick brains.." he also compared Christianity to a disease and something he wanted the German people to be immuned from.

    Not that any of that should matter, there are plenty of people who do claim Christianity who are either liars or just horrible Christians.(?)
    But I don't know who they are. Matter of fact that's one of God's job. To seperate his people from those who are not. But to say Hitler was a Christian, is like saying "yeah I get Playboy, but it's just to read the articles".

    Late, feen

  13. Feeno, maybe you are right about Hitler exploiting Christianity to further his cause. He was very manipulative like that.

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  15. Little Suzie is free to go to Sunday school.

    But we'll discuss what she learned at home, and Dad who knows way more about the origin of Christianity than any ordinary Sunday school teacher, is going to be sure little Suzie has all the facts before she comes to any set conclusion. This doesn't mean I'll tell my daughter how to think, but I will arm her with the knowledge she needs to be highly informed on such topics.

    And we'll likely have to screen what and whom she's coming into contact with, because little kids can be victimized very easily, and so as caring parents we'd do our best to keep her safe. We would NOT want her running into any pedophiles or loons like Ms. Braybrook: i.e.:


    And hey, I love Christmas Nativity scenes! In fact, I love everything about Christmas! It's the least "Christian" holiday of them all! I pride myself in teaching Christians the importance of the Nativity, and ask them to find me a magi... and ask them to point out which religion the three magi are from again... yeah, exactly.

    And then comes Jesus mysterious birthday! And again, whose religion is that?! And yeah, Dec. 25th, right.

    And you like Christmas trees right? Yeah, all good Christians do! They put them up every year. Never mind God will smite you for putting up one and that the Bible expressly forbids it! Pagan winter solstice worshipers all... so yeah.

    And how did that become Christianity's biggest day of celebration again... and, oh yeah, there's a reason for that too, duh. And I sip my Atheist cocoa, and enjoy my Atheist Dixie Chicks singing good old fashion Yule tide carols, and I bask in the glow of Atheist cheer and the buzz I got from granny Atheist's atheist eggnog earlier. And the next day, after our atheist Santa has come, we open our secular presents under the pagan Christmas tree!

    It's a jolly good time. Really. Truly. ;)~